Many people throw the word red flags around, but have you ever heard of green flags in a relationship? Learn more about them in this article.
Before dating, many people tend to have a list of deal breakers and red flags. Perhaps you loathe stingy partners and wouldn’t give them a chance. Or you can’t stand people that play mind games and take advantage of others. You are within your right to set these standards, as turn-offs are personal.
Besides, in relationships, you should be wary of some unhealthy and toxic behavior before investing your time. However, you shouldn’t focus all your energy on this, lest you forget the good side. The green flags in a relationship can be as important as the red flags.
What are some green flags in a relationship, and how do you identify them? This relationship article explores everything you need to know about relationship green flags to notice.
What are green flags in a relationship?
Observing the green flags in dating as much as the red flags help you determine the long-term compatibility of a potential spouse. So, what are some green flags in a relationship?
Red flags are like the red sign at the traffic light. They signal you to stop and caution yourself in a relationship. They also tell you to thread carefully and nudge you to end the relationship when right.
On the other hand, green flags demonstrate someone’s positive character and behavior, which indicates that the relationship will survive. It is characterized by honesty, trust, openness, and values. Knowing the most common green flags ensures you don’t fall victim to toxic relationships.
These green flags indicate that a person will likely develop a healthy relationship. It also gives you the confidence that your relationship is heading in the right direction, and you take the necessary steps to strengthen your bond.
While the relationship green flags list appears positive, they differ for every couple.
For instance, some people might say the argument is a red flag for them. However, arguments are parts of a healthy relationship if they are done logically to resolve conflicts. This particular red flag can turn into a green flag.
How can you discern between red flags and green flags
Indeed, green flags are positive characteristics a person finds attractive in a relationship. Sometimes, however, green flags and red flags tend to look alike. That brings us to the question, how do you identify the relationship between green flags from red flags?
Before you label a behavior or attitude a green flag, you must feel good and positive about them. What determines green flags in a relationship is whether you can state categorically that you have made progress toward building a healthy relationship.
Green flags are intentional and conscious efforts from someone to develop the relationship. It doesn’t involve trivialities, time-wasting, lies, gaslighting, irresponsibility, manipulation, etc. Every action is directed towards having the relationship around for more time.
Indeed, our previous relationships, experiences, and what we see in the media can affect how we see things in a relationship.
Naturally, you may be predisposed to looking out for the red flags that you ignore the green flags. However, relationship green flags change your perception even if you don’t realize the act that caused this change.
Red flags are usually toxic behaviors in the form of aggression, manipulation, lies, irresponsibility, and narcissism. On the other hand, green flags foster deeper connections between partners.
5 examples of green flags in a relationship
What are some green flags? You must know the examples for a comprehensive and detailed relationship green flags list. That will prevent you from racking your brain trying to determine if a behavior is a red or green flag. Here are some examples of green flags examples:
1. You can express your feelings freely
One of the examples of green flags in a relationship is the free will to express your feelings without fear. Not many couples can speak their mind freely.
But with a healthy relationship, you feel safe and secure. This person discusses their emotions quickly. It’s also easy to become vulnerable and have difficult conversations. This shows they are willing to deepen the connection and bond.
2. They validate your emotions
Another green flag example in a partner is the ability to authenticate your feelings without making you feel less of yourself. Someone who constantly dismisses your feelings or views could make you emotionally exhausted.
A good partner, on the other hand, understands your emotions by apologizing when necessary and giving reasons for their actions that might hurt you.
3. They make time for you
Everyone is busy with one schedule or the other. However, the sign of green flags in a relationship is making time for your partner.
If your prospective spouse schedules dates and arrives on time or finds a way to spend time with you within their busy schedules, you are dealing with a good partner.
4. They seek your opinion before making decisions
Another green flag in a person is putting you first. When your partners always seek your opinion or point of view before deciding, it shows they are invested in the relationship. Also, it means they respect you and believe you can make informed decisions.
5. They support you
One of the top green flags in a relationship is support for a partner. Partners in an intimate relationship only have each other. Although you have friends, getting the proper support from your other half motivates you.
15 green flags in a new relationship you must notice
If your relationship is still fresh, you should know the green flags in a relationship and how you can identify them. Let’s check out 15 green flags in dating an intentional partner below:
1. They express their feelings
One of the green flags in a person is when a potential partner expresses their thoughts and emotions freely to you. This means they aren’t afraid of being vulnerable. More importantly, it is a way of telling you not to be afraid.
Someone who also expresses their feelings without holding back has no secrets. It is only natural that you reciprocate, creating a safe place for you and your partner.
2. They have good relationships with people
Although it has nothing to do with your relationship directly, having a good relationship with family and friends is one of the green flags in a person.
If they can maintain and nurture good relationships with others, imagine how they will treat their intimate partner. Besides, a strong network of close friends and family means they maintain positive relationships.
A red flag is someone who finds fault with others or constantly talks behind others. If you are comfortable discussing with others, they might do worse to you.
3. You share the same values
Some of the best relationships feature partners with the same principles and values. This characteristic makes them compatible. You must share the same values with your potential partner in a new relationship. Pay attention to some characteristics, beliefs, opinions, and ways of life.
Ensure they align with yours. Otherwise, there will always be conflict, and you might not see eye to eye. While you don’t have to share the same perspective in life, there should be a mutual understanding of some things.
For example, you must have the same belief in children or raising a family.
4. You have a regular conversation
Another green flag in a relationship is that you meet and discuss constantly. Getting to know and understand each other is crucial in a new relationship. You can only do this if you find time to see it.
When you discuss, try to navigate the topic towards understanding their worldview, what they stand for, principles, strengths, weaknesses, etc. Your communication should provide insight into who your intending partner is and their behavior.
5. They listen when you talk
Hearing is different from listening in a conversation. If your partner looks at your eyeballs when talking, not at the things you say or asks questions regarding the topic, it’s a green flag. It shows they want to understand you.
6. They give their undivided attention
We live in a world plagued with distractions from our phones, TV, and so on. If you find someone who puts everything on hold when you are around, they may be the right person for you.
Paying attention to someone is a green flag that indicates that your partner cares about you.
7. They make you a priority
When partners consider each other when making decisions, it’s a green flag. Putting your partner first shows you value them and respect their stance on matters. In turn, it makes them feel essential and assures them of a long-term bond.
8. They talk about the future
One of the green flags in men you should observe is how they talk about the future. In a new relationship, it’s rare to see someone talking about the future already, even though they are yet to know their partner fully.
While it might sound strange, it shows this new person is optimistic. They are telling you, “This is a safe place for you. I want the relationship to last.” Expressing that you want your relationship to last long is a green flag you shouldn’t ignore.
9. They make you the best
Another sign of a free flag in a relationship happens when you can be your best with your partner. When you see them, you get motivated to achieve your goals and dreams. A good partner will push you to achieve dreams that appear unachievable.
Every action and step they take is directed towards helping you to achieve success. They are your cheerleaders. They are also your comforter when things don’t go how you want.
10. They check on you often
Indeed, you may not have time to see each other often. Even at that, a green flag indicates that your partner checks up on you to know how you are faring. They call in the morning before going about their activity for the day and call in the afternoon as well.
Finally, before they go to bed, you are also the last person they call. While calling to check up on your partner may sound cliche, it helps partners develop the proper connection, especially at the early stage of a relationship.
11. They remember little things
When someone wants something so bad, they put all their time into knowing it. One of the green flags in a relationship many need to acknowledge is the ability to pay attention to detail. You may have casually mentioned your grandma’s birthday.
Or you complained about a coworker. You will be surprised that your partner remembers these events. This shows they are paying attention to you rather than just listening to your talk.
12. They make time for you
Another point to add to your relationship green flags list is when your partner makes time for you. Just because it’s a new relationship doesn’t mean you must see it every time. People are genuinely busy, and finding some time might be difficult.
Suppose your potential partner is usually busy yet tries to see you. In that case, it’s a good sign that they want the relationship. It shows they are invested in the relationship and ready to do good work.
13. Their words match their action
It’s easy to make promises, boast or convince others that you want to do something. If your potential spouse acts what they say, it’s a green flag. The beginning of a relationship is a time for partners to know each other and make themselves likable.
At this stage, it’s easy to say many things. However, these words and promises only matter once they can back them up with action. Saying something and doing another is a red flag that puts people off.
14. They respect your boundaries
Setting healthy boundaries regardless of the relationship establishes respect. As partners, you are the closest to your spouse, but that doesn’t respect them. Someone who understands who you are and the things you want shows a glaring green flag.
People must know some boundaries: sex, finance, physical, and emotional. Boundaries ensure people honor your personal space.
15. They are always curious about you
Even if you have had countless conversations about your personality, a good partner always knows more about you. When partners have a deep understanding of each other, it reduces the chances of having conflicts. It also helps them resolve issues.
Some commonly asked questions:
Here are some important answers to questions that can help you gain more clarity about the green flags in a relationship:
- What are green flags in the talking stage?
Green flags in the talking stage are healthy signs that show that someone is invested in the relationship. They may include respecting your boundary, making time for you, supporting you, and honoring their commitment and promises.
- What are the red flags in a guy?
Red flags in a guy include toxic behavior such as dishonesty, rudeness, intimidation, putting others down, aggression, abuse, signs of narcissism, victimization, or abusive behavior. Knowing these red flags helps you avoid toxic relationships.
Enjo your life
Many people know red flags as toxic and unacceptable behavior or signs from someone or a relationship. On the other hand, green flags in a relationship are healthy and admirable signs and features that make relationships last long.
While you pay attention to red flags, you shouldn’t ignore the green flags in a relationship. They help to deepen the bond between spouses and establish a strong relationship foundation. If you need more help creating a relationship green flags list, it’s best to go for couples counseling.